Tuesday 14 June 2016

Older woman and officer - joke

The Traffic Stop


An older lady gets pulled over for going 70mph in a 35mph zone ...

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: I'd give it to you but  I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago  for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want
to see.

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls
for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer
slowly approaches the car, clasping his half! drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman
steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman:  Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and
murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite
stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a drivers license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it
to the officer.

The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a
license, that you stole this  car, and that you murdered and hacked up the
owner.

Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was going 70 in a 35, too.

Dosti kya hai - Shikha


Dosti sirf koi alfaz nahi jo mit jaaye,
Umar nahi jo dhire dhire dhal jaaye,
Ye ek pyara sa ruhani ehesas hai,
Jiske liye jitna bhi jiye kam pad jaaye.

Shikha

Uncha uncha shetrunjaya na sikhro sohaya - jain stavan


Vo bhi to muje yaad karte honge - Shikha










Vo jo har pal shaamil hai meri shayari ke har jazbbato mai,
Kabhi tanhai mai vo bhi to muje yaad karte honge.

Jiske liye mera ye dil bekarar raheta hai uske hi khayalo mai,
Kabhi akele mai vo bhi to apna dil e karar ganvate honge.

Jisse Izhaar e ishq karne ke liye puri duniya se lad jau mai,
Kabhi duniya ke samne vo bhi humse ikrar karna chahte honge.

Jiski yaado mai raato ko gaheri nind se bhi uth jaaya karti hu mai,
Kabhi kabhi vo bhi raat ko yaado mai meri jagte rahete honge.

Jiski wafa ki roshni se hai har pal ujala mere dil e aangan mai,
Kabhi kabhi vo bhi to mere pyar ke dipak jalate honge.

Durd e judai  bhagwan ne likhi hai kya sirf Shikha ki kismat mai,
Kabhi kabhi kya meri judai mai vo bhi to aansu bahate honge.

Shikha


Readers, ye koi mere jivan ki kahani nahi par kisi na kisi ke jivan ki kahani jarur hogi. Isme ek premika apne premi se door hai or uski jo halat hai usiko maine yaha pe thoda bahot dikhane ka prayas kiya hai. Sachhi tadpan to vo hi insane baya kar sakta hai jisne aisi tadpan ko saha ho...aap sabse namra gujarish hai ki humari bhulo ko nazar andaz kare..





Palko ko maine - Shikha

Palko ko maine dhire se uthaya or dekha teri or, Janna chahti thi kya kahe rahe hai tere ye naina. Kaise ek pal mai  naina tere ...